A Year in the Making

As of today I officially relocated from my home state one year ago.

A goal of nearly fourteen years and three hundred sixty-five days ago, I achieved it. Not to study abroad or go on a internship, but without an estimated return date or ticket in hand.

At the time I was so consumed with logistics and saying goodbyes I barely had time to process. I mean, we had less than ninety days from when we received notice of our move to when we needed to step on the plane. I was excited for the next chapter though and jumped right in.

When my mom came to visit in January she said this would be one of my biggest years and looking back…I can’t say I disagree.

In this past year I:

  • Moved in with just my partner (no roommates!)
  • Went to the Mountain Region for the first time
  • Began commissioning art
  • Attended therapy continually/successfully
  • Started a data analytics certification
  • Got engaged
  • Bought my first place
  • Began planning my wedding
  • Experienced my first snowy winter
  • Landed a job I didn’t think I stood of chance of getting
  • Learned one of my cats WILL eat hoodie strings like spaghetti if left alone
  • Started watching Anime again
  • Reached closure on a long standing friendship

I’m sure there are so many things I’m forgetting, but all in all it’s been a hell of personal year. My biggest goal going forward though is to start posting here again! I’m so tired after work y’all. Getting used to commuting again has taken much longer than I expected. I just come home, shower, and pass out…I’m working on it.

Wishing everyone well and hoping good things are in the works for all of you!

artist: @artoshtu

Yackety-Yak: How Can You Tell?

How can you tell if someone actually loves you?

That’s tough…I guess it depends. With some people I don’t think you ever really know. You just have to have faith that they do.

Faith is dangerous. 

And so is love.

Have you ever loved someone? 

To love and to be in love are different things. 

How do you figure? 

When you love someone it’s like being on the shallow end of a pool where you know your parameters and it’s easy; in theory, to navigate.

Such as? 

Such as loving a family member or a friend or even a pet. You know where you start and the general rules are mapped out by social context. You may go to the deep end- sometimes abruptly, but you can always go back to the shallow end in most cases…if it’s healthy, at least. But when you’re in love you’re starting in the deep end and usually with no warning. One moment you’re on the edge of the pool and the next you’re completely submerged. The farther in love you fall; the further down you go and the only way out is with that ladder because the shallow end is nowhere in sight. Making your way back to the surface let alone trying to pull yourself out without slipping back under suddenly feels impossible compared to those steps at the shallow end. 

…So how do you know when someone’s “submerged” for you?

You can take their word for it, study their actions, and even take other people’s word for it…but that’s about it.

So you’ve been in love.