Last night I tried Kratom for the first time.

Kratom? What is that?

My friend described it as a tea with euphoric properties.

…Okay…Is that what it is….or…?

I guess go? I’m still a bit confused on what it is exactly to be honest.

Did you like it though?

Funny you should ask because let me tell ya- it did not go well.

Oh true? Go on.

At first it was alright. I mean, I wasn’t a fan of the taste at first and then I got used to it. We stayed for about two hours, went through two cups each, felt really jazzed during our talks, etc. It wasn’t until we left that things went downhill. My stomach began to feel weird. On one hand I felt a bit drowsy, but at the same time my heart was racing and my hands were even shaking a bit. We ended up having to pull over less than a block from my place just so I could vomit.

I’m sorry. What?!

I’m serious. My hands were shaking as I washed my face and everything. Standing or moving around was horrible…Eventually we got food and water in us and fell asleep, but it was a journey and a half. Let me tell ya.

Okay. Hold up. Is any of that normal?

Uh, according to my friend- no. They said they’ve had it at two other locations several times and it’s always been a breeze. Earlier today they text me saying they think the place gave us bad quality, so they’re going to call them.

Woah…so that’s why you look like crap today?

HA! Maybe, but I’ve also had a migraine all day, so who knows what’s from what.