Sometimes I wonder if there’s such a thing as being too dependable while also not being dependable enough. 

…What? 

As in; I used to try to be there for people in as big a way possible and then over time I began to pull back to focus more on myself, but now there are times when I feel like I’m leaving people out to dry. 

Oh. 

Yeah. It’s weird because part of me thinks, “oh, we’re all becoming adults who handle our own affairs” and then another part of me thinks, “but by focusing more on myself does that mean i’m giving people the cold shoulder?”. 

Is there a reason why you need to be so dependable?

I think…it may be because when it comes to interpersonal relationships I believe my value stems from either my sexuality or what I can give them. 

Which explains why you made it rain on people…

Exactly. So now that I’m not spending money on people for no reason-

-Now you’re insecure. 

Yep.  

…

….

…Maybe you should learn how to depend on others.